Child Custody and Visitation: Preparing for Family Court Services

When parents cannot agree on a child custody and child sharing plan, either parent may file a Request for Order with the Family Court. In San Diego, the filing of a request for custody and visitation orders automatically triggers the scheduling of an appointment with Family Court Services (“FCS”). This meeting is known as Family Court Services Recommending Counseling. If the parents do not reach an agreement during the appointment, then the social worker in charge of the meeting will prepare a recommendation to the court with their opinion on what orders should be made.

You have very limited time with the social worker and therefore every second you have is vital for making a good impression. You must be able to explain what you want to the social worker and why it is in the best interest of the child. Remember that in child custody and visitation proceedings, California’s policy is the “best interest of the child.”

Often two parents have plenty of negative (biased) things to say about the other that the social worker won’t care to hear, unless supported by evidence and actually have an effect on the child. Also note that just because a person is not so great as a spouse, a friend, an employee, or other role, they may still be a good parent. These items are critical when discussing how your proposal is in the best interest of the child.

A parent must display honesty to earn credibility with the social worker. One way to obtain credibility is acknowledging both your strengths and weaknesses as a parent and coparent. The key to this is identifying steps you have taken, and will take, to improve upon your weaknesses. When a parent shows consistent effort to become a stronger parent and co-parent it encourages the social worker to believe that the child is in great hands while in their care.

A person’s strengths and weaknesses as a parent are not everything, however. They must show an understanding of their child’s character, wants, and needs, the strengths and weakness of their physical environment in raising their child, the psychological environment, and other people in their daily lives. An awareness of their child’s schooling, social health and ability, physical health and ability, behavior in different settings and at different times, and others can help a parent adapt as needed for the benefit of their child.

There are many more subjects that may or may not be critical to any specific case so it is important to talk to your attorney and/or a professional trained to prepare you for FCS. Note that the information and self-reflection may indicate that parenting time that is in the best interest of the child, at this time, may be less than 50%. The important takeaway lesson is to work with your attorney to create a plan to help you achieve the time you desire and that is in your child’s best interest. Sometimes the goal is achievable in a short time period of less than a year; other times the goal may be a long-term plan of one to five years depending on your situation. Parenting is an 18-19 year responsibility, legally, and a lifelong commitment in reality, so an early developed plan will make a world of difference down the line.

It is important to know your rights, responsibilities, and options regarding the child custody and visitation issues. Our family law team at Naimish & Lewis can advise you on this and other family law matters. To schedule an initial consultation with an attorney at our firm, please contact us.